Men Lead, Women Control? The Double Standard No One Wants to Admit

A viral video between Honourable Abena Osei-Asare who is a member of Parliament and the acting CEO of DVLA, Julius Neequaye Koteya recently sparked a national conversation about power, gender and emotional expression in leadership. But beyond the controversy lies a deeper question, Do we judge authority differently depending on whether it’s male or female?

On Culture Daily, the hosts unpack what they call the “ripple conversations”-the subtle, often unspoken expectations society attaches to women in leadership.

“This is not about that viral video,” one host clarified. “It’s about the broader perception of women in positions of power and how gender influences how we react to authority.”

Online, many women shared personal stories about entering workplaces expecting empathy and understanding from female bosses only to experience the opposite.

“Some even said it’s worse,” one panellist noted. “They go in thinking a female boss would relate more to their struggles, but sometimes they find less compassion.”

This perception of “the tougher female boss” is not new. Psychologists refer to it as the double bind, the notion that women in leadership must be strong enough to earn respect but gentle enough to be liked, whereas men are rarely judged by those same emotional standards.

“When a man is firm, he’s decisive. When a woman is firm, she’s called difficult,” one contributor said.

The panel agreed that leadership should never be judged through the lens of gender.

“When you’re hired, you’re hired to do a job not to be male or female,” another added. “But empathy is still key. Understanding what employees go through doesn’t make you weak; it makes you human.”

Ultimately, the Culture Squad called for a shift in perspective, one that focuses less on whether leaders are male or female and more on whether they are fair, competent and emotionally intelligent.

“A bad boss is a bad boss,” one host summarised. “It has nothing to do with gender. It's personality, character and leadership style.”